Insanity

My brother Johnny loaned me his Insanity dvds and I tried the fitness test last night (after I had already done 30 minutes of yoga) and it is HARD! And it was just the test to see how fit I am! I couldn't even do all the moves that the people on the dvd were doing.

It really IS insanity. But, I think I will try it again because it is kinda a challenge that I want to defeat! Plus, I know two of my brothers are doing this and if they can do it... I can attempt it.

A Wash!

Last week was a wash! I was sick all week and I did not exercise at all. I was just too sick to do anything other than cook, clean, and change diapers. And, I was not as strict with my diet because no one wants to diet when they are feeling crummy. You just want to eat what you want to eat, when you want to eat it. But, I did try to stay my hand when it came to portions.

So, last week, I lost no weight, but I also gained no weight. Total wash.

But, today I am feeling better and I will be working out this week and I want to see those pounds continue to fall off!

I found out this weekend that my brother Jake (my oldest) is also on a weightloss quest so that he can get a better life insurance policy. He has already lost 15 pounds (same as me) and he is only 3 pounds heavier than me. This is depressing. My brother, who is taller, and broader, and more muscley should weigh significantly more than me. And, he has dropped his weight significantly faster than me. Men are so annoying in this way. Their weight can go up and down so easily when I feel like I am fighting for every pound.

I know that it is not a competition... but, in my family, it is ALWAYS a competition. Life is a competition. And I really want to win it.

So, I have new determination to try hard this week.

Also, I tried a new birth control last week and it was awful! I had cramps every day and crazy mood swings, so I have already stopped taking it. I will have to find a different method because my body is not ready yet for another baby, but I hate feeling pain and craziness from hormone drugs. Birth controls and me just don't go well together.

Making a Change

This post is on birth control, so if you feel that is a TMI, stop reading now.

For the past year, I have been using the Depo shot as my birth control and I've decided to make a change. This form of birth control is a shot that I get once every three months. I have multiple problems with this birth control.

1. The shot is known to cause women to gain weight and I feel like it is part of the problem with my slowness in losing my weight.
2. It causes bleeding that can sometimes last weeks.
3. It is hard to plan a pregnancy around this shot because it takes 6-9 months to wear off. Which means that I have to plan trying to get pregnant 9 months in advance.  I say 9 months because that is how long it took for me to get pregnant with Dan after I had the shot.

So, I've decided to make a change. Hopefully, it will help me in losing my weight faster and it will make it easier when I do decided to get pregnant.

I know there are a lot of birth control options out there, and I just need to find the one that is right for me. One that doesn't make me sick and doesn't make me fat.

Accomplishment!

This weekend my family was sick and I did not get to exercise. I was up until midnight on many a night with sick kids and there was no time to exercise. And, because everyone was sick, I was cooking comfort food that I knew that the kids would eat. Pizza, mac and cheese, and delicious cookies.

I still attempted to limit my calories by eating cereal for breakfast and salad for lunch and then eating a lot more pizza than I should have for dinner. But, I knew that I had eaten more than I should, especially on Saturday. Plus, I was a sloth and was laying down a lot because I was all achy and sick.

So, when I got on the scale this morning, I was not hopeful. I knew that my weight would reflect my lack of exercise and my cookie consumption. But, I was very surprised when the scale said, 215lbs! This means that since I started this 6 weeks ago, I have lost 15 pounds!

I was surprised that I lost three pounds last week. Yay!

I know that I will fluctuate at the beginning of the week like I do every week, but hopefully I can maintain this through the week and stay at 215 or below.

I realize that 15 pounds in six weeks is not enough, but I am a little closer to my goal. Just 25 more pounds to go before am I at the weight where I feel like it will be safer for me to get pregnant.

My Workout Routine

So, I'm still working on getting a solid workout routine and some days I'm just too tired to do anything, but I am still trying to do some sort of exercise 3-4 times a week (even though my original goal was 5 times a week). Finding the time is the hardest part of this, which is why it is so inconsistent.

Last Week-

Monday: Just Dance for 30 minutes and stretch for 10 (while the kids played at my feet)
Tuesday: Jog with the stroller to the park taking the long way (I wanted to Just Dance, but found that I had Wii elbow. It's a real thing!).
Wednesday: Attempt to Zumba with Marie and then have the kids attack us and ask for things every three seconds and make it impossible. Then, give up and don't exercise at all.
Thursday: Wake up to Dan at 5:45am, bottle him, get on my elliptical and go for 20 minutes and stretch for 10 minutes. Then, go to work at 7am.
Friday: Calesthenics for 10 minutes, Yoga for 20 minutes, and stretch for 10. Marie taught me some calesthenic moves.
Saturday: Be super lazy and don't do any exercise!
Sunday: I never exercise on Sunday as it is a rest day.

This Week-

Monday: Zumba for 20 minutes, Yoga for 20 minutes and stretch for 10.
Tuesday: Calesthenics for 10 minutes, Weight lifting for 10 minutes and stretch for 10.
Wednesday: I intend to jump on my eliptical tonight and do some cardio, but I am really sore from my calesthenics yesterday and yoga on Monday. Yoga is hard!


All of my workouts are done in my own home (or in my neighborhood if I am walking with the kids). I do this because I barely get time with my family, I'm not going to take more time away from them. I like the exercise. It gives me more energy and I can feel myself getting stronger. I thought that I would really hate it, but my family has been really supportive and have lent me some of their at home workout dvds so that I can change up my exercise and keep it interesting.

My workouts are short, usually about 20 minutes per activity, but I try to keep it intense so that I am straining through the activity and getting a good workout.

I hope that this works for me because I don't plan on buying a workout program, I just don't think that it would be for me. I like designing my own and doing what I feel like doing that day without guilt because some exercise is better than no exercise. Even if it is just dancing in front of the Wii with my kids.

Update

I measured and weighed two weeks ago and I did it again today and I did not like the results as much as I did last time.

Dominant Arm: 14" (+.5")
Chest: 43" (-.5")
Neck: 14.5" (0)
Natural Waistline: 39" (-1")
1" below bellybutton: 46: (-.5")
Hips: 46.75" (-.25")
Dominant Leg: 27.5" (-1")
Dominant Calf: 16.5 (0)
Weight: 218 lbs (-4)

Hopefully my measurements are better in another 2 weeks.

Total inches lost in the last 2 weeks: 3"
Total inches lost total: 8.5"

If I am Consistent

Last week was really discouraging all week because I kept weighing in at 220lbs and I didn't seem to be losing anything! I couldn't seem to get below the 220 mark. Then, Saturday morning, I stepped on the scale and it read 218! Yay! 2 pounds down for the week is not too shabby.

I weighed in this morning and I was still at 218, so as long as I keep doing what I am doing, I should stay below the 220 mark.

So, I lost two pounds two weeks ago and two pounds last week. If I am consistent, I can be below 200 pounds by... August!

When I got pregnant with Nicole, I was at 190lbs. I feel like that is an okay weight to get pregnant at, so I am on track for that if I can keep going like I am going. If it turns out that I am less than 190 at the end of the year, even better.

I am feeling more confident today because I lost the two pounds at the end of last week even though I discouraged most of the week.

So, my total weight loss in 5 weeks is 12 pounds. I can do better than that right?

Discouraged

I'm feeling a little discouraged. I've been eating healthy and exercising 3 to 5 times a week for a month now and my results just aren't happening fast. I know that if I want fast results, I would have to do some extreme changes, especially to my diet and I just don't feel ready for it.

When I first decided to do this, it was when I stepped on the scale and saw 230lbs. And it was the weight I was when I was 7 months along with both of my kids and that was just too depressing. Now, I'm at 220lbs, which lets face it is not that much of a difference. 10lbs in a month? That is nothing.

I want another baby. I want our family to grow, but my body is not prepared to get pregnant again. Getting pregnant at this weight would be very unhealthy and would increase my risks during pregnancy. I would be at risk for diabetes, and all sorts of other things. So, I really need to lose the weight before I can get pregnant again. My goal is to be pregnant around the beginning of next year, so I MUST lose another 30 pounds in the next 7 months.

I have a realistic mind. I know that if I continue with my current regiment, I can't continue to lose 10 pounds a month. There are plateaus and things to overcome when doing weight loss and you have to change things up to continue.

I think I'm discouraged recently because I have been stressed at work. Work has been hard, I have been getting told that I am doing things wrong a lot lately. Which is not entirely my fault. I've been doing what I've been told to do, it just isn't what the higher ups want to see, they just aren't very good at telling me beforehand what they want things to look like and it is frustrating feeling like I can't do anything right and being forced to repeat my work so many times.

So, my first thing I go to when I am stressed is treats. I eat cookies and chips and snacks to just get through the day without crying because I'm so emotional from being yelled at everyday. I've tried very hard and successfully avoided the vending machines during this stressful work time, but I've been over eating on my fruits and veggies and going way over on my calories lately. I wish that I were home with my kids and not at work every day. Taking care of the kids is a whole other set of emotional and frustrating circumstances, but at the end of the day, I will always love my kids. I love my job less and less lately.

And thus, I am discouraged. I want things to happen magically, even though I know that they won't. There is so much emotion from other things in my life that I start to defer my emotion to my weight loss rather than putting it where it belongs. I'm discouraged with my job, I'm missing my husband as he is gone four nights a week at school, and I'm missing my kids while I'm at a job that I am not enjoying.

Maybe next week will be better.

My New Inspiration

I started watching the current season of the Biggest Loser on Hulu and I've found it very motivational. They hugely fat people, much fatter than me are able to work hard and lose their weight and it makes me think that I can do it too.

The Biggest Loser is very extreme. They work out 6 hours a day and limit their caloric intake. They lost massive amounts in short amounts of time. The women average about 5 pounds a week. I know that that is not something that I can do because I certainly don't work out that much, but it still makes things seem doable.

One of the contestants from a previous season said in an interview that if you just lose one pound a week, in a year, you will have lost 52 pounds. That seems like something that I can very much do. One pound a week is easy!

Another thing I have learned from the show is to have goals, benchmarks with rewards when you reach the benchmark. So, here are the bench marks that I am going for.

• Under 200 pounds: I haven't been under 200 pounds since before I got pregnant with Nicole. I went up and over the 200 pound mark during my pregnancy with Nicole and haven't been back since. I am 23 pounds away from being under 200 pounds.   My reward for this goal will be a new hair cut and hair dye, from a real salon, not done myself.
• 175 pounds: I was this weight a few months after I was married because I quickly gained weight when I got married, but by the time I was married for a year, I was 190 pounds. So, 170 seems like a good second bench mark. My reward for this goal will be a new nightstand. That may sound like a weird reward but it is something I really want, but won't treat myself to because it is a want, not a need.
• 155 pounds: This goal seems so very unatainable. I haven't been this weight since I got married. This was my weight when I got married and it is my ideal weight. In highschool I was 145 pounds, but I have realistic thinking, I'm never going to be my highschool weight because I have a woman's body now and I have had babies and I want to be a healthy weight, not ultra skinny. My reward for this weight will be a trip with my husband.

My goal pant size is a size 10. I am currently a size 18. I was a size 10 when I got married, so I know that I can get back to that size.

Update

So, I haven't written in a while because I had nothing good to report. I figure if there is nothing good tor report, then don't report at all. No one likes a negative fat lady. So, I didn't work hard last week, I ran one day, did yoga one day and worked in the yard another. I neglected to stretch after I worked in the yard because I didn't think of it as a workout so much as yard work and then I was sore. I'm still sore. From stupid pulling weeds in the yard. So, I was able to run last night and then stretch my muscles and I'm not quite as sore as I was yesterday.

Yesterday I finally pulled out my measuring tape and did my measurements. Here are my updates after 3 weeks of calorie counting and exercise.

Dominant Arm: 13.5 in. (-.5)
Chest: 43.5 in (0)
Neck: 14.5 in (0)
Natural Waistline: 40 in (0)
1" below belly button: 46.5 in (-2)
Hips: 47 in (-1.5)
Dominant Leg: 28.5 in (-.5)
Dominant Calf: 16.5 in (-1)
Weight: 222 lbs (-6)

So, thus far, I have lost 5.5 inches and 6 pounds. Which is not a lot. But, that just means that I have to work harder and try harder to lose more inches and more pounds. One good thing is that I have gone up one belt loop. I can finally use the second loop on my belt rather than the last one on the belt. Here's hoping that I keep going in that direction.

Goals:

This week I plan to do 3 days of cardio and 2 days of Yoga/Pilates with 2 days of rest. I continue to try and keep my calories in the 1500 range, but sweets are the bane of my diet and often force me into the 1700s on some days. Hence why things are going so slow. I can do it. Do better this week than last.

I feel myself getting stronger. I am using a level 2 resistance on the eliptical. I want to be at a level three by the end of next week. Go Becky, Go.